If your house is anything like mine, “Mom, tell me a joke!” is a daily request — right up there with snack demands and mysterious stains appearing on clean shirts. Lucky for all of us, this list of clean, silly, and downright giggle-worthy jokes is here to save the day (and maybe your sanity).
Why parents love this: These are jokes kids can repeat anywhere — school, the car, or the dinner table — without parents having to worry about awkward surprises.
Some are groaners, some will make you laugh out loud, and at least one will probably get stuck on repeat for a week.
💡 Save this for later: Bookmark this page or come back to it the next time boredom strikes, you need a quick laugh, or your kids ask for “just one more joke.”
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🐶 Animal Antics
Silly creatures and wild puns? Yes, please.
Q: What do you call a dog magician?
A: A labracadabrador!
Q: Why don’t elephants use computers?
A: They’re afraid of the mouse.
Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?
A: A pie-thon à la mode.
Q: Why did the crab never share his food?
A: Because he was a little shellfish.
Q: Where do cows go on vacation?
A: Moo York City.
Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A: Fshhh.
Want more jokes? We got 'em
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April Fools' Day Jokes and Kid-Friendly Pranks to Make Everyone Laugh
✏️ Schoolyard Zingers
Perfect for lunchbox notes or impressing friends at recess.
Q: Why did the math book look so sad?
A: Because it had too many problems.
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite subject?
A: Spelling.
Q: Why did the student eat his homework?
A: The teacher said it was a piece of cake!
Q: Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
A: Because her students were so bright!
Q: What did one pencil say to the other?
A: You’re looking sharp.
Q: Why was the computer cold?
A: It left its Windows open.
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Check out these kid-approved joke books available at Walmart — perfect for lunchboxes, road trips, or your living room comedy club.
🍕 Food Funnies
Warning: May cause snack cravings.
Q: What kind of cheese isn’t yours?
A: Nacho cheese!
Q: Why did the banana go to the doctor?
A: It wasn’t peeling well.
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A: A blood orange!
Q: Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
A: Because it felt crumby.
Q: What did the lettuce say to the celery?
A: Quit stalking me!
Q: What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A: A carrot!
🚗 Wheels & Wings
For your little transportation-obsessed comedians.
Q: Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
A: Because she’ll let it goooo!
Q: Why did the bicycle fall over?
A: It was two-tired.
Q: What’s fast, loud, and crunchy?
A: A rocket chip.
Q: What kind of car does a sheep drive?
A: A lamborghini.
Q: Where do boats go when they’re sick?
A: The dock!
Q: Why don’t planes ever get lost?
A: They always take flight direction.
🤪 Just Plain Silly
The ones that will live rent-free in your kid’s brain.
Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A: A gummy bear!
Q: What did one wall say to the other?
A: I’ll meet you at the corner.
Q: Why did the cow go to space?
A: To see the moooon!
Q: Why don’t skeletons fight?
A: They don’t have the guts.
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that’s sleeping?
A: A dino-snore!
Q: What did the zero say to the eight?
A: Nice belt!
Make a “Giggle Jar!”
Print out these jokes, cut them into strips, and toss them in a jar. Let your kids pick one whenever:
They say “I’m bored”You need 5 more minutes of peace
Or you just want a family laugh before dinner
We can’t promise quiet, but we can promise giggles — and honestly? That’s just as good.
🎉 Like this article? Subscribe now to Macaroni KID Macaroni KID Johnson County Summer Camp Guide and make parenting a little easier (and a lot more fun). Because some days, a silly joke and a list of free kid activities is all that’s holding it together 😂
